Recently, someone very special to me said to me that he notices that his Chinese colleagues always talk to other Chinese at his workplace. It is like they form an inclusive Chinese group within the company. I have to admit what he observed is very true and consistent to what I've seen in most Asian communities. Despite the ease of communication in their mother tongue, what else causes this phenomenon? I have to wonder...
Americans are very nice people in general. They are not rude, but not super friendly either. In the U.S., immigrants are pretty much on their own. Immigrants have to figure out their own way to fit in. To an outsider, it is difficult to penetrate the "white" society without any insiders to guide them to the entrance.
China welcomes foreigners with open arms. When a foreigner goes to China, whether it is for leisure or business or study, s/he will immediately find him/herself surrounded by local Chinese, who want to be their hosts. Chinese feel it is an honor to show foreign visitors around, so they have the opportunity to explain Chinese history, tradition, culture, food, arts and music to their guests from far away.
For Instance, how many White co-workers at your workplace pro-actively ask their Asian coworkers to hang out with them? When someone made a joke and people in the whole office are laughing except those Asians in your office, how many approached them to explain the joke to them? Sure, I know probably most the culture or historical references to the joke are missing for your Asian coworkers to get the humor. However without some nice American to explain to them, it will be even harder to understand! And you wonder why they have the tendency to talk to their own people???
When I was in High School, not many schoolmates I knew made attempts to help me understand about American culture. I had to figure out most things on my own, slowly. At least, if I ask someone about something, I would get an answer. That is one difference. Americans expect others to ask first, rather than just start telling. This only works if an immigrant knows exactly what to ask. A lot of time, culture shocks can be so subtle; we feel its existence but just can't name it. So it is possible to not even able to put together a question.
If you ever visit China, you will know what I mean. Every Chinese is so welcome; everyone is so eager to talk to foreign visitors, to help them understand their country, their people. One two-week trip to China, you will absorb more about China and Chinese than any immigrant in the U.S. can understand about this place in a year.
Well, on the bright side, there are a lot TV programs in China discuss about other countries. Sometimes, in those programs, they often invite foreign exchange students studying in China to get on the show and talk about their experience in their own country and in China. Many American TV shows and movies can be found in China too. There is also a Chinese version for every American reality show. Otherwise it will be more difficult for Chinese immigrants to interface with non-Asian.
Off course not every American is indifferent about other ethnical groups. There are many I know are very nice and friendly. To those Asians who have American friends and Americans who have Asian friends. Hopefully, they can fulfill the duty of culture ambassadors, cross the culture barrier and tumble down the invisible wall. Asian's lifestyle is not so different to American's anyway. If you want to make an effort, you will find more similarities than differences. :-)
